GUYS LIKE SHOOZE TOO

In case you thought that my audience appeals to the ladies only, you are wrong. To prove that point, today’s posting is going to be dedicated to all the great guys that I know. Some of you guys have crazy shoe fetishes and secretly stalk The Mamagirl’s page to salivate over 6+ inchers. Some of you dream of what it might be like to run your fingertips across the smooth leather body of the shoe. Maybe you fantasize about cupping some red Louboutin soles in the palms of your hands. Possibly you dream about inserting your thumbs into the toe box. You guys are some sick puppies…and I love you all. But I also love a man who appreciates pure functionality – so this shoe is for the Form Meets Function Man.

I first learned about this shoe last summer when Jackis and I took the boys to visit their cousins in Duxbury, Massachusetts. We experienced a particularly stressful afternoon on the beach WHERE WE LOST GUS. How many of you well intentioned parents out there have lost your child at one time in your life in a public place? Perhaps a mall or a store or even Disneyworld? Well, we managed to lose Gus at the beach – the double whammy of excessive crowds and dangerous waters! It was insanely crowded with people, kids and thousands of SUVs parked on the beach. After a terrifying 20 minutes where the beach had been closed down and every lifeguard and coastal agent had been called into action, I was reunited with my GussyMan who was being driven back to me by the coastal police in a sirened SUV brigade. Lots of tears, heart palpitations, sweat bullets and more.

You are probably asking what kind of mother am I to lose my child at the beach? But sometimes you can get really distracted from your senses when you see a great idea or a great invention – and that’s precisely what happened. At this beach, we saw all the guys wearing flip flops that doubled as a bottle opener. That’s right. By all appearances, this was a regular flip flop. But when you take it off and turn it over, embedded into t he sole of the shoe is a cap opener. Genius. No more “Does anyone have a bottle opener” or “Honey, make sure to bring a bottle opener to the picnic” or “Shit, I forgot the bottle opener, but let me try and de-cap it with my keys or against this ledge” or “Why the fuck didn’t we buy canned beer, shouldn’t we have learned our lesson by now?” This is a fantastic invention and I bet the inventor is a multi-millionaire by now. And so, after we recovered from the anxiety of losing our child at the beach, Jackis went to the flip flop store and bought himself a cool pair. And a six pack. And we opened beer with his shooze and toasted our little Gussy Man, in the safety of a gated backyard where you can’t lose a child.

So attention all mamagirls -- Father’s Day is coming up next weekend. This is a great gift idea for your Form Meets Function Kinda Man.

Reef Men’s Fanning Ultimate Bottle Opener Sandal
http://islandsurf.com/islandsurf/page/product/sku/RF_%7CD%7C_002300/p/Mens-Fanning-Ultimate-Bottle-Opener-Sandals.html?af_id=105&gclid=COqIk8DclaICFQXG3AodjV_HEg&search=bottle-opener-sandals&Apparel=Footwear&Brand=Reef&cm_vc=CROSS_SELL_PRODUCT&l=c&v=alt2